Breaking: English Language Deemed Superfluous In Marketing Communications

LensCrafters sells a lot of fucking glasses. They have over 1000 stores across North America and they are just a small part of the global vision services group, Luxottica, of whom the FYMD Consulting Group refers to “vertically integrated AF.”

That’s right. Luxottica basically owns most of the frame design, manufacturing, brands, retail distribution points (including clinical diagnosis) and much of the lens manufacturing/distribution - so even if you didn’t buy your Tom Ford sunnies at Sunglasses Hut, there is still a chance they made the lenses…Because Monopoly.

Frequent readers know we love product benefit ads because they remind people of the good things about your product without all the extra “storytelling”, “emotional brand connection” or other content buzzwords your award winning agency is selling you and me, but most definitely you.

Anywho.This product benefit ad is the copywriter equivalent of stock footage - was there a limit on the amount of complete sentences they could use? Does anything in this ad make you want to use Lenscrafters…Because Marketing.

In sum, you don’t need to be a consultant like us to realize vision services is a very smart business because just about every person on earth has two eyes…however, the LensCrafters marketing department clearly isn’t as sure that every person has a brain.

…Because Words.